Trump-Scented Candle

Available for a limited time only! (We hope.)

You don’t win anymore. You don’t win at buying candles, and you don’t win at having a nice-smelling home. But with a Trump-Scented candle, you will start winning again! (Just at those specific things though.)

The Trump-Scented Candle is a phenomenal deal. Just phenomenal. We’ve made a great, great candle. It combines all of the classiest smells (steak and tanning lotion) to produce an aroma that is tremendous. (To be clear, by “tremendous,” we mean “large in scale or intensity.” We are not claiming that it smells good.) The candle comes in a beautiful shade of orange that looks very natural and not at all weird and off-putting.

You know how candles never say “Merry Christmas” anymore, because they are worried about being “politically correct”? Well, not this candle! If you buy this candle, you are going to see the words “Merry Christmas.” Believe me.

The Trump-Scented Candle candle may look small in the photo, but we guarantee you there’s no problem. We guarantee.

This is a very real addition to our growing lineup of candles that smell like politicians. Learn more by visiting our Etsy Store. If you have the good fortune to live in St. Louis, the Trump-Scented Candle is available from fine retailers such as Phoenix Rising and Grove Furnishings.