Did you know that, in addition to running the amazing website you see before you, Kate and I also make candles that smell like world leaders? It’s true! I’m surprised you didn’t already know, because we bring it up ALL THE TIME.
And today, dear readers, we are going to teach YOU how to make candles. That way you’ll be prepared to come work for us when our candle empire grows out of control and we need to hire staff, or at least bring on an unpaid intern.
President of Poland
Here is something we’ve learned from checking our email inbox every month or two: a lot of people have strong opinions about where we’ve ranked Polish president Andrzej Duda on our list of hottest world leaders.
We have received a few angry-ish comments regarding our ranking of President Duda, and now we are going to respond to them all at once, because that seemed like the most efficient way to deal with the whole Duda situation. It’s like killing 14 birds with one stone! And if there’s one thing we really want, it’s a bunch of dead birds.
President of Brazil (sort of)
Do not read this story straight through from beginning to end. These web pages contain many different adventures you may have as Brazilian president Dilma Rousseff. From time to time as you read along, you will be asked to make a choice. Your choice may lead to success or disaster!
Since antiquity, illustrated manuscripts have helped bring clarity to confusing, ambiguous texts. And, like a monk toiling away in some secluded monastery, I have illustrated the transcript of Donald Trump’s July 21 interview with the New York Times. Its mysteries and occluded meanings have been brought to light, via the magic of the mechanical pencil Kate uses for crossword puzzles.
Chapter 6: Putin the Moves On You
Alexander Lukashenko insists on walking you home after dinner, even though it is freezing outside and you keep hinting that you would rather him take you home in a cab.
At some point in their lives, every American memorizes the faces of all 43 U.S. presidents. But have you ever wondered what our vice presidents look like? No? Oh.
Um. I’m just going to leave this here:
The Vice Presidents of the United States: In Order of Hotness.